* Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.
* Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
* Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
* Marriage is the triumph of imagination over intelligence. Second marriage is the triumph of hope over experience.
* Q: If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the other hand, what would you have? A: Very large hands.
* Q: Why did you smash your husband’s head with a bottle? A: He woke up this morning and asked, where are you, Shola? Q: So? A: My name is Ngozi!
* A friend of mine said that he wanted to improve his golf. I suggested that he should go on a course.
* What men want: A woman who can cook, a woman who earns good money, a woman who loves him and a system to make sure that those 3 women never meet each other.
* What’s the difference between stress, tension and panic? Stress: When wife is pregnant, tension: When girlfriend is pregnant, Panic: when both are pregnant.
* Children: You spend the first 2 years of their life teaching them to walk and talk. Then you spend the next 16 years telling them to sit down and shut up.
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